Johnny Turbo Versus the 32 Bit Menace!
by EtherealMutation
Summary: FEKA intends to lie to the kids about their 32-bit system being a standalone product. Only Johnny Turbo can save the day!


**This story is based on the short-lived advertising series of comics centered around the NEC Turbo-Grafx. You can find out about it on Google.**** I'm releasing the non-derivative elements of this story into the public domain. Do what you wish.**  


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Hello, videogame fans. My name is Tony and I'm here to tell you a story about an exceptional man. His civilian persona is Johnathan Brandstetter, professional computer expert, but when the evil of FEKA rises up and threatens the videogame buying populace with their lies and inferior games, he dons his costume to become Johnny Turbo, defender of justice! With his ray gun and street brawling expertise, those FEKA goons don't stand a chance.

However, even with such a formidable force on their backs, the FEKA Czar and his goons prove to be relentless. Even now, they prepare their latest scheme. With the development of their 32 bit system, they intend to figure out an angle to further mislead and bamboozle the poor kids and further attack the image of Turbo Technologies Incorporated.

"Are we finished with the first shipment of the 32-bit system?" the czar asks, his red eyes glowing fiercely. In spite of the light emanating from them, he's still somehow cloaked in darkness. It's practically an anti-spotlight in this brightly lit office of evil, deflecting the rays of light coming from the ceiling lights and window.

"Yes, sir," one of the goons responds. They are a sickly looking species, wearing black suits with black fedoras and shades that mask their red eyes. They're not even human.

"Aren't you worried about Johnny Turbo?" one of the goons asks, a tone of worry in his voice, "He's destroyed another one of our factories the other day. We can't keep going much longer."

"Stick with the plan," the czar responds, "With our new 32-bit system, even Johnny Turbo can't stop us now! Ahahahahahahahaha. Mwahahahahahahahahahahahahah ahahaha hack cough cough weeze... ha!"

Back in our apartment, we are just doing the usual. Playing some good old _Lords of Thunder_ in the comfort of our apartment living room while drinking some Budweiser and talking about our days. John is just wearing his usual red button down shirt and blue jeans while I'm in my white shirt and grey vest with a red bow tie. He always makes me dress up to the nines at all times, but that's what I like about him.

"Those FEKA CD games are so old hat," my beloved John starts, "The other day, they claimed that _Solar_ is the first CD RPG, but we had _Cosmic Fantasy 2_ over a year earlier. I had to go clean shop. When will they realize they they just don't compare?"

"Hear that?" I ask, picking up something from the TV in the other room. We pause our exhilarating game and walk into the kitchen. The local news station is running a story about the local street market, with some woman in her mid thirties interviewing a black suit goon.

"This is Anna James and I'm here in front of the Metro Market. FEKA released their latest system today, now with 32 bits. We're here with one of their representatives. Tell me, what can we expect with this new system?"

"Thank you, Anna," the goon says, taking the microphone from her hand, "As you know, FEKA has been laying low recently. Some say it's because of that vigilante Johnny Turbo spreading lies about our business practices and destroying our products. That's not why. We needed to put all our effort into this system. After a long two years of research and development, we are finally ready. For only 170 dollars, you, too, can own the first ever 32 bit system. We're even offering a free game with each purchase!"

"What game is that?" I ask, squinting to look at his hand.

"It's _Day Trap_," Johnny says, barely even glancing at it, "It's a CD game. That's just despicable. Not only do you have to buy the 100 dollar 16 bit system to make that 32 bit system work, but their free game also requires the FEKA CD as well. That's another 100 dollars. So before you can even play that 'free game', you have to spend 350 dollars. And on top of all that, the 32 bit system only gives 32 bit graphics without giving 32 bit quality. What do they think they're pulling?"

"I think I know what we're going to do," I say, running towards the bookcase in the living room.

"We?" Johnny says, quickly getting up and hopping over. I love when he moves so agilely. Like a 300 pound tiger.

"Oh, come on," I say, "You have to let me go. I even made my own costume and everything."

"I need you to stay here," Johnny says, "Only I am needed for this."

"But I want to go!" I say, "We could be the Turbo Duo and really strike fear in the black hearts of those FEKA goons!"

"Just stay in the kitchen," Johnny says, "I'll be back in a little. I want to see some nice marinated steaks on the table when I get back."

"Bah," I say as Johnny presses a button on the fake Turbo-Grafx 16 on the fake bookshelf, opening into his own personal enclave. I know when he's right and it does seem like a simple job. He puts on his green jumpsuit, strapping his yellow armor over it. He picks up a belt with a holstered ray gun, strapping it around his waist with a large buckle that snaps into the armor. He grabs his baseball cap and shades, finishing his awesome ensemble. He slides down the Turbo-Pole, dropping on top of his Turbo-Cycle and driving out for great justice.

Meanwhile, at the market, hundreds of kids are lining up around the block to buy FEKA's new 32 bit system. Money in hand, they walk up to the three goons standing in front of a cargo van filled to the brim with systems in neat little boxes.

"Come one, come all, and buy the latest in FEKA technology here!" one of the goons shouts out, "It has everything! 32 bits and a free game! All for the low, low price of 170 dollars!"

"Then you have to buy our 100 dollar 16 bit system to even use the system and our 100 dollar CD system to play that game! Mwahahahahaha!" says one of the other goons, his eyes glowing right through his shades.

"Dude, not cool," the other one says, staring at him.

"Halt, evil doers!" Johnny shouts as he runs in, fists clenched and a grimace on his face.

"It's Johnny Turbo!" one of the goons shouts, shoving a kid aside as he runs towards our hero. He tries to throw a punch, but Johnny is much too fast for him. An uppercut launches the goon 20 meters in the air, his limp body smacking on top of the truck and rolling off the side. The other two goons both rush headlong towards our hero, fists raised. Johnny casually smacks their heads together, letting them fall to the ground. He notices the first goon starting to run away from in front of the truck, but Johnny proves too fast for this escapee. Before the goon even gets ten meters away from the truck, Johnny grabs him and suplexes him into the pavement. With the three goons laid out, Johnny turns to face the crowd of children.

"Don't believe FEKA's lies!" Johnny shouts out, "They say that their system is only 170 dollars, but you then have to buy their 100 dollar system to even use it! And that free game they're giving requires you to spend _another_ 100 dollars on their CD attachment! They're ripping you all off, but thankfully, I, Johnny Turbo, saved the day!"

"Johnny! Johnny! Johnny!" shouts the crowd of children, imitating Johnny's stance of holding a fist defiantly in the air. Today is a good day to be a hero.

"Not so fast, Johnny boy!" a voice blares out from the truck.

"Who dares?!" Johnny says, turning towards the cab.

"It is I, the Czar of FEKA!" the voice responds, two pinpoints of red light coming from the shadowy figure within the cab.

"Czar!" Johnny shouts, pointing at the truck, "Today, we end this!"

"My feelings exactly!" the Czar shouts out, pressing a button inside the truck. The truck starts to transform right in front of the crowd, sprouting two arms and two legs. The roof of the cargo area slides off as the truck starts to stand up, dumping its entire load of systems onto the ground. As the cab tilts forward to form the robot's head, all the 32-bit systems in the area start popping out of their boxes and slither towards the truck. They start crawling around the truck robot, attaching themselves into various points within the body. After about twenty seconds, the truck is covered with a black armor of 32-bit consoles.

"Now, you shall witness the true power of FEKA Incorporated!" the voice booms out, a loud mechanical roar emanating from the robot as it stretches upwards.

"Not on my watch, you demon!" Johnny says, grabbing his gun and firing a couple shots. ZARK! ZARK! ZARK! They bounce off of the robot harmlessly.

"Silly fool!" the voice booms, "Your 16-bit powers are no match for the 32-bit FEKA! Taste the power!" With that, the FEKA Robot effortlessly swipes Johnny off his feet, launching him into a nearby building. Johnny craters himself in, defeated.

"Ugh!" Johnny shouts, dropping his gun as he slides down.

"As you see," the voice starts, "This vigilante is no match for the power of FEKA! Now, give me all your money!"

Meanwhile, I am running through the streets with a dufflebag of equipment. Dinner be darned, I just had to get the latest in Turbo technology to him. Something just seems wrong about FEKA coming out in the open like this. They should know better than to mess with Johnny Turbo by now. I come around the corner to find Johnny propped against nearby wall as a giant black robot towers over the crowd of children. Screams fill the air as The robot shoots power cables at the kids, ensnaring them and lifting them up so it can vacuum the money right out of their pockets.

"Tony," Johnny says, gasping for air.

"Johnny!" I shout, running over to help him. He looks pretty beat up.

"Tony, I'm done for," Johnny wheezes, "My 16-bit powers are no match for him."

"Don't say that, Johnny!" I say, "It's not over yet!"

"I should have listened to you," Johnny starts, "I thought it was just going to be an easy job, where you wouldn't be needed. But I was wrong. Oh, how I was wrong."

"Come on, get up," I say, trying to lift him. I can't even budge his 300 pound body.

"Take my hat and shades," Johnny says, "You must take my place as the new hero. Avenge me..." Johnny closes his eyes and slumps to the side.

"Johnny?" I say, shaking him. He doesn't respond. "**NOOOOOOOO!**"

"Where's your savior now?" the Czar chuckles, launching AC power adapter bola after bola at the running children.

"Right here, FEKA scum!" I shout, standing in defiance. I am now wearing Johnny's cap and shades, armed with a laser cannon.

"Oh, please," the Czar says, dropping the kids and facing me, "You? You're just some nebbish nerd with a pocket protector! And your silly Turbo Duo and its 16-bits cannot compare to the true might of our 32!"

"Wrong, FEKA scum!" I shout, doing my best Johnny impression, "I just got the latest technology from NEC in Japan! The very first real 32-bit system!"

"Actually," the Czar starts, "The FEKA Neptune beat yo-" I shoot a chunk off of the robot's shoulder.

"No more of your lies, you FEKA goon!" I shout, pointing my finger defiantly at him.

"Oh, that's IT!" the Czar shouts, extending the robot's arms out in front of it. A hail of CDs launch out of it, slicing into the ground near me. I make a break for it and take evasive action, barely maneuvering out of its range. As I hide behind a building, I hear some heavy footsteps run towards me.

"Come out and face me, boy!" the Czar shouts, punching right through the corner of building and starting to tear down towards me. I do a somersault out of the path of the descending fist and fire some hot lasers into it. As the Czar starts stumbling backwards, I press a couple buttons on my cannon.

"It's time to go beyond the impossible and destroy the FEKA threat forever!" I shout, aiming my cannon at the head of the robot. A press of the button later, a huge ball of energy flies out of the barrel and impacts with the robot. White energy swarms over the robot, consuming it as it struggles helplessly. As it drops onto its knees, the whole robot turns a bright white before exploding.

I run over to Johnny to see how he's doing. It's so hard to believe that my beloved teddy bear was defeated by FEKA. I just refuse to allow it. I shake him some more, hoping to get him to come back.

"Johnny, wake up!" I shout.

"...huh, Tony?" Johnny says, groggily wiping the sleep out of his eyes.

"You're okay!" I shout.

"Of course," Johnny says, grabbing his hat and shades off of me, "I have far too much padding for a simply punch like that to do me in."

"Why did you do that to me?" I ask, tears rolling down my eyes, "I thought you were a goner!"

"I needed you to prove yourself," Johnny says, brushing himself off, "I knew you had the power in you to defeat the Czar."

"I'm glad it's all over now," I say, motioning towards the wreckage of the truck robot, "FEKA isn't going to recover from that any time soon."

"There's one last job we have to do," Johnny starts, "FEKA of Japan!"

"Excuse me," a little kid says, walking up to us, "Who are you guys?"

"I'm Johnny Turbo!" Johnny says, raising his fist up.

"And I'm Tony FX!" I say, holding my laser cannon up.

"And together, we are the Turbo Duo!" we both say in unison. We both knew it was time.

"FEKA of Japan, we're coming for you!" Johnny says, pointing towards the northwest. We could almost see the island from here.

A small bit of text that says "end of presentation" in white letters over a black background pop up on the screen. The executive meeting room has a table with a bunch of executives, wearing black suits and ties as they type into their Toshiba brand laptops. By the projection screen is a scruffy haired man wearing a dark blue polo shirt and some khaki slacks.

"So, what do you think?" the man in blue says, pressing a button on his remote to turn the projector off.

"That's the best you could come up with?" the executive sitting at the head of the table asks, "Our company is about to be liquefied in a few months if we can't come up with a solid advertisement to gather support for the Turbo FX and you produce... this?"

"We're already working on the third part," the man in blue starts, "We're trying to figure out a plausible way for the Turbo Duo to defeat FEKAzilla, but-"

"Save it," the executive says, "I'm just going to tell the Japanese branch that we're done for. It's painfully obvious."

"But... Johnny Turbo has brand recognition and..."

"Oh, and while your contract will mean that you still get paid until the end of June," the executive starts, "Outlasting our salaries by several months when the company gets dissolved, I just want to say this anyway: you're fired. Get out of our sight."

And so, did Johnny Turbo's adventures end. Not with a bang as promised in this comic, but with an unreleased whimper. TTi was dissolved that same year, with all of its staff released. A parking lot was constructed where their offices used to reside. However, little does the world know is that the real John Brandstetter, hired by Sega of America after the downfall of TTi, didn't have only his name ripped for use in advertising...


End file.
